This anger management technique can be very difficult to successfully implement because it requires a lot of soul searching and deep thought.
The anger management technique is that you need to know who it is that you should be blaming, and more importantly, what you should be blaming on whom. The first step towards mastery of this anger management technique, is to make sure that you are differentiating between what it is that has actually occurred and your resulting feelings.
For example, lets pretend that your co-worker spilled hot coffee all over you after having only been at work for a few minutes. You will obviously get angry in this situation, but the question becomes, what exactly are you blaming the co-worker for$%: Are you blaming them because they spilt coffee on you$%: or are you blaming them because your now angry$%:
While it is certainly true that they are responsible for the spilled coffee (well, it was most likely an accident so not really), however you should not hold them responsible for your reaction to the incident. In fact, by doing so you only make the negative emotion stronger and perpetuate the angry sentiment.
The crux of this anger management technique is that you need to hold yourself accountable for your reactions and only by accepting this can you hope to reconcile your frustration. Also, once you acknowledge the fact that only you are responsible for your actions, you can start making significant advances to your ability to deal with anger and stress.
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